


Not Weird, Just Limited Edition

by jeongcheongs



Category: NINE PERCENT (Band), 偶像练习生 | Idol Producer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Break Up, Chatting & Messaging, Crushes, Everyone Is Gay, Light Angst, M/M, Secret Identity, Strangers to Lovers, Texting, xukun is a flirty piece of shit, xukun is the typical college heartthrob that everyone likes, yuehua kids, zhengting is so cute
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-04-30 22:33:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14506920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeongcheongs/pseuds/jeongcheongs
Summary: caixk: u think im cute?caixk: excuse u im not cute im hot as fucccWhere Zhengting is a stranger who thinks Xukun is cute, Xukun is kinda really heckin' flirty and the Yuehua kids are the main reason why everybody has headaches.





	1. Stranger Danger

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii so I know theres probably a lot of chatfics out there already but I REALLY REALLY wanted to write one myself cause I personally love them so much~~
> 
> I hope you guys will enjoy this ^.^
> 
> btw the underlined parts of the chatfic actually has links and I guess you don't really have to look at them but I thought it would be fun for you guys to actually know what they're sending each other :)

 

**Saturday 12:51 pm**

  
****

**jeongjeong created a private chat with caixk**

 

 

 **jeongjeong:** hi :)

 

 **caixk:** …

 **caixk:** who r u

 

 **jeongjeong:** does it matter

 **jeongjeong:** I’m sure you’re old enough to be over stranger danger

 

 **caixk:** how did u get my id

 

 **jeongjeong:** your friend gave it to me 

 

 **caixk:** wt who

 **caixk:** tell me who wtf

 

 **jeongjeong:** :o why?

 

 **caixk:** cuz they cant just give my id to random ppl

 

 **jeongjeong:** you don’t want to talk to me? :(

 

 **caixk:** i have no idea who u r bruh

 **caixk:** r u a stalker

 

 **jeongjeong:** I’m not a stalker I swear!

 

 **caixk:** r u one of those Ikun kids?

 

 **jeongjeong:** ?? wts an Ikun?

 **jeongjeong:** well I don’t think I’m an Ikun..?

 

 **caixk:** then tell me who u r

 

 **jeongjeong:** no!

 

 **caixk:** then im not gonna reply u

 **caixk:** bye

 

 **jeongjeong:** aww :(

 **jeongjeong:** I just wanted to tell you that I think you’re cute :(

 

 

**Sunday 6:20 pm**

 

 

 **caixk:** u think im cute?

 **caixk:** excuse u im not cute im hot as fuccc

 

 **jeongjeong:** that too ~

 

 **caixk:** u know this will be a lot less creepy if i knew who u r

 

 **jeongjeong:** well too bad for you :P

 

 **caixk:** send me a pic of urself

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 **jeongjeong:** no

 

 **caixk:** c’mon i wanna see

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 **jeongjeong:** no

 

 **caixk:** or im not talking to u ever again

 

 **jeongjeong:** wow okay

 **jeongjeong:** [img.jpg](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQKQF8beaz6FL1SpCvVmIcYZiXJ0gEYohu-6j-Pf7TEjMiPpTy5HQ)

 **jeongjeong:** ^ there

 

 **caixk:** wow what an old shitty un-hd pic of u

 **caixk:** so bye

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 

 **caixk:** well…?

 

 **jeongjeong:** fineee

 **jeongjeong:** [img.jpg](https://78.media.tumblr.com/62bbf9b4dd4b776da06bc9305f019b5e/tumblr_ooqqbvYWkB1w7mwd2o1_1280.jpg)

 **jeongjeong:** I took this pic like probably 4 years ago or something so…

 

 **caixk:** ahh better

 **caixk:** u cute ;)

 

 **jeongjeong:** !

 **jeongjeong:**!!

 **jeongjeong:** stop lying  >:(

 **jeongjeong:** you can’t even see my face

 

 **caixk:** i can identify cute from a mile away

 **caixk:** u wanna send me a pic of ur whole face so i can prove my point? ;)

 

 **jeongjeong:** no!

 

 **caixk:** u sure abt that

 

 **jeongjeong:** yes!

 **jeongjeong:** ….maybe

 

 **caixk:** ;) u kno u want to

 

 **jeongjeong:** omg 

 **jeongjeong:** just saying you text weird it’s almost hard to understand you

 **jeongjeong:** can’t you use proper grammar?

 

 **caixk:** anything for you baby boy ;*

 

 **jeongjeong:** why are you flirting with me

 

 **caixk:** aww is baby boy flustered?

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 **jeongjeong:** you’re a dick

 

 

**jeongjeong changed caixk’s name to asshole**

 

  
****

**asshole:** wow i didnt know that you swear

 **asshole:** thats hot

 **asshole:** not as hot as i am tho

 

 

**asshole changed their name to hot asshole**

  
****

**jeongjeong:** wow

 **jeongjeong:** nice ego you got there

 

 **hot asshole:** excuse me who was the one that called me good looking just this morning?

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 **jeongjeong:** I change my mind I don’t want to talk to you anymore

 

 **hot asshole:** suit yourself

 **hot asshole:** btw just because my name is hot asshole doesnt mean that i have a hot asshole

 **hot asshole:** or maybe i do ;) care to find out

 **hot asshole:** just kidding i dont bottom

 

 

**Sunday 8:40 pm**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

 **thot magnet:** hey bros

 **thot magnet:** do u guys know who this person called jeongjeong is

 

 **baby bait:** nope

 **baby bait:** y would we know who that is??

 **baby bait:** ofc we dont

 **baby bait:** haha

 

 **orange boi:** wait what justin

 

 **baby bait:** we don’t know anyone called jeongjeong :)

 **baby bait:** right chengcheng? :))))

 

 **orange boi:** oh

 **orange boi:** righttt :)

 

 **thot magnet:** …

 

 **boogiemonster:** lol

 

 **thot magnet:** y’all sus af (;¬_¬)

 

 **boogiemonster** : why r u asking tho?

 

 **thot magnet:** this dude called jeongjeong messaged me

 **thot magnet:** idk who he is but he said my friend gave me my id

 **thot magnet:** i really wanna know who did it >:(

 

 **boogiemonster:** i wonder who it could be…

 

 

**Sunday 9:02 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

 **fanxixi:** omg guys

 **fanxixi:** zheng-ge actually did it

 

 **hamtaro:** ??

 **hamtaro:** was he the one that clogged the toilet

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** didn’t we already decide that we’re blaming it on zeren

 

 **dimples:** wt do you mean it was wenjun

 **dimples:** he was the last one that used the toilet

 

 **fanxixi:** what no it was you

 **fanxixi:** but back to the point

 

 **dimples:** NEVER IN MY LIFE

 **dimples:** HAVE I FELT SO BETRAYED

 

 **hamtaro:** shut up and let chengcheng talk

 

 **fanxixi:** thank you :)

 

 **dimples:** W O w

 **dimples:** i expected this from chengcheng but not from you quanzhe

 **dimples:** wait til zheng-ge hears about this  >:(

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** lol its quanzhe zheng-ge will probably put the blame back on you or something

 **HuangXinChuang:** _@hamtaro_ how do you do it?

 

 **hamtaro:** im cute

 **hamtaro:** deal with it ( •̀ᄇ• ́)ﻭ✧

 

 **dimples:** well so is justin but you don’t see zhengting coddling him

 

 **hamtaro:** cause justin’s a little piece of shit

 

 **just in time:** u called?

 

 **fanxixi:** GUYS

 **fanxixi:** can we talk about what’s actually important?

 

 **just in time:** you telling them about zhengting ge?

 

 **fanxixi:** yeh

 

 **just in time:** WELL

 **just in time:** two weeks ago zhengting ge asked me for cai xukun’s id

 **just in time:** and he finally got the guts to message him

 **just in time:** and xukun is like wtf who is this man

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** wait xukun as in dancer cai xukun??

 

 **fanxixi:** justin wtf

 **fanxixi:** i wanted to be the one to tell them >:(

 

 **just in time:** get over it you overgrown baby

 **just in time:** but yes that cai xukun

 

 **hamtaro:** DANG dad’s making moves ;)

 **hamtaro:** if he gets with cai xukun does that mean we’ll have another dad?

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** maybe if zhengting-ge gets with cai xukun then he’ll have his own fans and they’ll all buy more beds so everyone can STOP FUCKING SLEEPING ON ME

 

 **dimples:** lol xinchun stop being so salty

 **dimples:** you’re called huang xinCHUANG for a reason

 

 **an actual pup:** HUANG MINGHAO

 

 **fanxixi:** oh no

 

 **just in time:** yes dad? ♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ)

 

 **an actual pup:** did you say anything to cai xukun?!

 **an actual pup:** he’s not replying me

 **an actual pup:** what if he knows who I am?

 

 **just in time:** he doesn’t trust me

 

 **fanxixi:** yeahh we actually listened to you 

 **fanxixi:**  so treat us out to dinner

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** if you take them out you have to take the rest of us too

 

 **hamtaro:** yay!

 

 **an actual pup:** (;Ծ⌓Ծ;) why did I decide to have so many kids

 

 **dimples:** get with cai xukun and you can split the bills with him

 

 **an actual pup:** !! stop 

 **an actual pup:** also

 **an actual pup:** who changed my name?

 

 **hamtaro:** it was justin~

 

 **just in time:** you little snake ass bitch

 

 **an actual pup:** language!

 **an actual pup:** I don’t really mind this name tho :)

 **an actual pup:** puppies are cute!

 

 **dimples:** uhh do you know what a “pup” is

 

 **an actual pup:** a baby dog?

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** lol read this: [pup definition](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Pup)

 

 **an actual pup:** …

 **an actual pup:** HUANG MINGHAO YOU ARE NOT MY SON ANYMORE

 

 **fanxixi:** well that escalated quickly

 

 **wenjunnie:** YEET.


	2. gayassmen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Xukun starts talking more to this @jeongjeong person. The Yuehua kids are unsupportive lil' shits, except for maybe Zeren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyheyy~
> 
> so I wasn't actually planning to update this early BUTT I just felt like it sooo... hope you guys enjoy it :)

**Monday 8:22 pm**

 

**hot asshole sent a message to jeongjeong**

 

 

 **hot asshole:** hey can i ask you something

 

 **jeongjeong:** sure if you want

 

 **hot asshole:** how do u know me

 

 **jeongjeong:** why do you want to know

 

 **hot asshole:** just curious

 

 **jeongjeong:** well then I’m not going to tell you

 

 **hot asshole:** fine fine

 **hot asshole:** i want to know who you are

 

 **jeongjeong:** well you’re never going to find out

 **jeongjeong:** but i’ll tell you just to humor you

 **jeongjeong:** im secretly the school caretaker that cleans the dance studio after you use it and i have fallen deeply in love with you

 

 **hot asshole:** lmao actually tell me

 

 **jeongjeong:** I’m not lying though

 

 **hot asshole:** im sorry im not into older men

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 

 

 

**Monday 8:54 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

 **an actual pup:** GUYS

 **an actual pup:** HE SAID HES NOT INTO OLDER MEN

 **an actual pup:** NOW WHAT DO IT DO :(

 

 **wenjunnie:** did you do something

 

 **an actual pup:** what do you mean

 

 **wenjunnie:** you tend to fuck things over for yourself

 

 **an actual pup:** no I don’t!

 

 **wenjunnie:** yea you do

 

 **just in time: also** y does wenjun get to swear

 

 **an actual pup:** he’s a mature adult

 

 **just in time:** i’m mature too!

 

 **hamtaro:** hah says the 5 year old

 

 **just in time:** fight me u fckin bih

 

 **an actual pup:** justin!

 

 **just in time:** technically i didn’t swear so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

 **dimples:** zhengting is glaring at his phone screen

 **dimples:** how is he still so cute

 **dimples:** cai xukun is missing out

 

 **just in time:** i mean do u expect zheng-ge to not fuck things up tho

 **just in time:** im just surprised that its over before anything even happened lol

 

 **wenjunnie:** this reminds me of that time when zhengting had a thing with eunki

 

 **hamtaro:** whos eunki

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** how do u not know wtf

 **HuangXinChuang:** hes zheng-ge’s ex

 **HuangXinChuang:** they met when zheng-ge was doing that exchange program in SK

 

 **an actual pup:** why are you guys bringing him up oh my god

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** they worked together on this stage and it was hella gay

 

 **dimples:** ikr i mean look at this shit

**dimples:[gayassmen.mp4](https://78.media.tumblr.com/55ab13130d2af80f662f700483e970f1/tumblr_ophf4ufdUH1v53urdo7_400.gif)**

**dimples:** [evengayermen.mp4](https://78.media.tumblr.com/0430a15827316897974dba229fd5805b/tumblr_ophf4ufdUH1v53urdo5_400.gif)

 

 **hamtaro:** _@an actual pup_ why didn’t you tell me about this :(

 

 **an actual pup:** aww I’m sorry

 **an actual pup:** I don’t like talking about it

 

 **hamtaro:** oh :/

 **hamtaro:** how did you guys break up?

 

 **dimples:** yeah _@an actual pup_ you never actually told us

 

 **an actual pup:** I THOUGHT I SAID I DON’T LIKE TALKING ABOUT IT

 

 **fanxixi:** lol eunki was a bad top and zhengting was complaining to justin about it but accidentally sent the message to eunki instead

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** LMAO RIP ZHENGTING

 

 **fanxixi:** literally eunki wouldn’t even acknowledge zheng-ge afterwards

 **fanxixi:** he would walk the other way whenever he saw zheng-ge

 **fanxixi:** it was kind of funny

 

 **an actual pup:** why are all my kids like this

 **an actual pup:** I’m having a crisis but you’re talking about my ex instead

 

 **wenjunnie:** well you haven’t even told us whats wrong so

 

 **just in case:** he probably told xukun that he was an old man that stalks him or something

 

 **an actual pup:** …

 **an actual pup:** are you with xukun right now?

 

 **just in case:** no im in class

 

 **wenjunnie:** shouldn’t you be paying attention

 

 **just in case:** no im smart

 

 **an actual pup:**  if you’re not with xukun how did you know

 

 **just in case:** i can read minds

 **just in case:** also xukun told ziyi and ziyi told me

 

 **an actual pup:**  oh

 **an actual pup:** well thats not it rlly

 **an actual pup:** you know he said he’s not into older guys!

 **an actual pup:** news flash: I’m older bitch

 

 **just in time:** yeah i dont think ive ever seen him date someone older :/

 

 **an actual pup:** sigh all hope is gone

 

 **wenjunnie:** did you actually just write sigh?

 **wenjunnie:** wow u must really be dad

 **wenjunnie:** i mean sad*

 

 **hamtaro:** why not both though

 **hamtaro:** sad dad: the adventures of a grieving father and his 6 children

 

 

**fanxixi changed an actual pup’s name to Sad Dad™**

 

 

 **Sad Dad™:** shut up I’m mourning

 

 **dimples:** omg dad told quanzhe to shut up

 **dimples:** who is this cai xukun and what has he done to my father

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** lmao u sound like u gonna fight him

 

 **dimples:** i am

 **dimples:** now someone give me his id

 

 **fanxixi:** …

 **fanxixi:** no wtf

 

 **dimples:** fine (｀^´)

 **dimples:** caixukun is too good for us anyways

 

 **Sad Dad™:**  what

 

 

**Monday 5:24 pm**

 

**jeongjeong sent a message to hot asshole**

 

 

 **jeongjeong:** hi

 **jeongjeong:** I just want to say

 **jeongjeong:** im not actually an old man

 **jeongjeong:** like

 **jeongjeong:** my kids say im old but

 **jeongjeong:** im not actually that old haha

 

 **hot asshole:**  wtf u hv kids?

 **hot asshole:** like more than one?

 

 **jeongjeong:** i technically have six “kids”

 

 **hot asshole:** y the quotation marks

 **hot asshole:** and how old is “not old” to u lol if u hv that many kids

 **hot asshole:** like at least 35??

 

 **jeongjeong:** no…

 **jeongjeong:** im 22

 **jeongjeong:** and they’re like my “kids” but they’re not my kids

 

 **hot asshole:** idk wt that means but i would love to meet your kids ;)

 **hot asshole:** they could use another dad ;)))

 

 **jeongjeong:** ...

 **jeongjeong:** but didn’t u said that ur not into older guys..

 

 **hot asshole:** woah

 **hot asshole:** such accusations 

 **hot asshole:** generally i like to be the older one

 **hot asshole:** but i’ll make an exception for you baby ;)

**hot asshole:[pic.jpeg](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DaG9OFWU8AE1KH2.jpg)**

 

 **jeongjeong:** wow

 **jeongjeong:** im going to go now

 

 

**Monday 5:49 pm**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

 **thot magnet:** omg

 **thot magnet:** the jeongjeong guy just like totally rejected me

 

 **orange boi:** wowowow S H O O K is cai xu kun

 **orange boi:** from an anger scale of 1-10 i bet kun’s at a level of HOW DARE YOU REJECT ME IM PERFECT 凸ಠ益ಠ)凸

 

 **thot magnet:** why that emoticon i’m not ugly excuse u

 **thot magnet:** i’m more of a HOW DARE YOU (︶‿︶)

 **thot magnet:** cuz the guy is still cute so

 

 **baby bait:** i notice that u didn’t deny that u think ur perfect

 

 **boogiemonster:** wow who is this guy

 **boogiemonster:** if he’s cute enough to reject xukun yet keep him interested then he’s definitely rlly cute

 **boogiemonster:** where do i meet him?

 

 **baby bait:** i’ll introduce u to him

 

 **thot magnet:**!!

 **thot magnet:** i thought u don’t know who he is?

 

 **baby bait:** o shit

 **baby bait:** well

 **baby bait:** i lied

 

 **thot magnet:** i thought we were friends omg

 **thot magnet:** did u know he has kids btw

 

 **orange boi:** nobody can beat ge’s position in justin’s heart

 ** **orange boi** :** its a universally known fact

 **orange boi:** unless its me cause I don't care about facts <3

 

 **baby bait:** also his kids are great btw

 **baby bait:** especially the maknae he’s def the most handsome

 

 **thot magnet:** chengzi you know him too?

 **thot magnet:** bEtRaYeD

 

 **boogiemonster:** so u’ll let me meet him?

 

 **baby bait:** sure

 

 **thot magnet:** um no

 

 

**thot magnet changed baby bait’s name to baby snake**

 

 

 **baby snake:** lmaojealousy doesn’t look good on you xukun

 

 **thot magnet:** ha

 **thot magnet:** HAHHAHA

 **thot magnet:** who said that im jealous

 **thot magnet:** i just don’t want ziyi to get involved with sus people

 

 **boogiemonster:** well justin and chengcheng are always suspicious

 **boogiemonster:** i don’t see you telling me to avoid them

 

 **thot magnet:**  u kno he went offline straight after i sent him a pic

 

 **orange boi:** lol

 **orange boi:** ur ugly face probably scared him away

 

 **baby snake:** rip no one loves u

 

 

**baby snake changed thot magnet’s name to ugly & lonely**

 

 

 **ugly & lonely: **thanks for being supportive :)))))

 

 **baby snake:** your welcome :))))))))))))))))

 

 **boogiemonster:**  xukun what photo did u send him

 **boogiemonster:** did u send him one of ur derps omg i bet u did

 

 **ugly & lonely: **no it was a cute pic

**ugly & lonely: [pic.jpeg](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DaG9OFWU8AE1KH2.jpg)**

 

 **orange boi:** wow

 **orange boi:** u look gross

 **orange boi:** no offence bro

 

 **ugly & lonely: **smh full offence taken

 **ugly & lonely: **some friends ya’ll are

**ugly & lonely: [img.mp4](https://78.media.tumblr.com/c973bf7f4995e320cfc0fe72f3ee3a87/tumblr_p42n0qOXa81x3a01co2_250.gif)**

 

 **baby snake:** it’s moments like these where i wonder why xukun has a fandom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay how was it?
> 
> tbh I have no idea where this is going so.... hope y'all stick around hehe
> 
> BTW yesterday I opened a Tumblr so y'all can hit me up if u want ;) idk how to link on notes buttt it's @drowningoncloudnine and I don't think its that hard to find I have zhengting everywhere so :))))
> 
> anyways I hope y'all enjoyed this and pls leave comments if you have any uwu


	3. *screams in frustration*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cai Xukun is petty and Justin is screaming throughout the whole thing. Also, something's up with Quanzhe...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR FAVOURITE MINION HUANGXINCHUN <33 I LOVE HIM SO MUCH IM DROWNING IN IT
> 
> hope you guys enjoy!

**Monday 12:02 am**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** hey

 **HuangXinChuang:** so y’all know what day it is today?

 

 **just in time:** uh the day for you to get a calendar

 

 **HuangXinChuang:** ㄱ.ㄱ

 **HuangXinChuang:** i question our friendship

 

 

 **Sad Dad™:** HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR FAVOURITE MINION!

 **Sad Dad™:** I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Sad Dad™: ꒰˘̩̩̩⌣˘̩̩̩๑꒱♡**

 

 **wenjunnie:** yeahh happy birthday xinchun~~

 **wenjunnie:** how are you 20 now holy fuck

 

 **just in time:** WENJUN SWOrE oH MY GoD

 

 **hamtaro:** ily xinchun u old man

 **hamtaro:** do u want me to get you a wheelchair for your bday

 

 **fanxixi:** _@hamtaro_ too bad i already got him a walker

 

 **just in time:** try hearing aids

 

 

**fanxixi changed HuangXinChuang ’s name to AI NI**

 

 

 **Sad Dad™:** we love u so much xinchun

 **Sad Dad™:** u deserve so much more than ppl can give u ;(

 

 **just in time:** AI NI

 **just in time:** WO AI NI!!1!!11

 

 **fanxixi:** HUANGXINCHUN WO AI NI

 

 **just in time:** HUANG XIN CHUN!!!!1!1!

 **just in time:** WO AI NI!!!

 

 **AI NI:** aww

 **AI NI:** all my self confidence is from you guys

 **AI NI:** so I really really love you all <3

 

 **dimples:** pls that line doesn’t work on us anymore

 **dimples:** [vid.mp4](https://78.media.tumblr.com/76b278a892f370cf92f4724259f0d65f/tumblr_p57rpti7V51x6c6cgo3_r1_400.gif)

 **dimples:** remember this?

 

 **wenjunnie:** that stopped working on us when you used it in front of a whole auditorium of people

 

 **AI NI:**..

 **AI NI:** aww :(

 

 **dimples:** ..

 **dimples:** but we love you too

 

 **AI NI:** (⁎⁍̴̛͂▿⁍̴̛͂⁎)♡ོ

 

 

**Thursday 4:06 am**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

 **baby snake:** cheng go buy cookies and milk

 **baby snake:** go fast

 

 **orange boi:** what

 **orange boi:** i hv no money

 

 **baby snake:** liar bing-jie sent u money yesterday

 

 **orange boi:**.. fine but pay me back

 

 **boogiemonster:** wrong chat guys

 

 **baby snake:** ask zheng-ge theyre his cookies

 **baby snake:** oh shit lmao

 **baby snake:** still gets the message across so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

 **boogiemonster:** also its 4ma

 **boogiemonster:** am*

 

 **baby snake:** don’t shame us 

 **baby snake:** attacked by my own people

**baby snake:** [img.jpeg](https://i.pinimg.com/236x/58/8c/41/588c411159cd63f7a28f2a501e294b1c.jpg)

 

 **orange boi:** he protec

 **orange boi:** he attac

 **orange boi:** but most importantly

 

 **boogiemonster:** this meme is ded

 **boogiemonster:** y r u like this

 

 

**boogiemonster changed orange boi ’s name to ded meme**

 

 

 **baby snake:** fcc finish ur meme if ur gonna start it

 

 **ded meme:** …

 **ded meme:** nothing rhymes

 

 **baby snake:** lol u dumb

 **baby snake:** smack whack frack lack back pack crack

 **baby snake:** i could go on for days

 **baby snake:** i tell chengcheng to get us snacks

 **baby snake:** he trips on the ground and breaks his back

 

 **ded meme:** wtf minghao

 

 **baby snake:** he thinks we don’t know when he does the frick frack

 

 **ugly & lonely:** stfu im sleeping

 

 **baby snake:** well someone’s grumpu

 **baby snake:** grumpy*

 

 **ugly & lonely: **i need my beauty sleep

 

 **boogiemonster:** to nurse that ugly face

 

 **ded meme:** ooo sick burn

 

 **baby snake:** RIP cxk

 **baby snake:** u wont be missed

 **baby snake:** good job ziyi

 

**boogiemonster:** [vid.mp4](https://78.media.tumblr.com/d003b3693ab8208ad116aa8dee39d5c8/tumblr_inline_p4zm1mJWNK1qhhtze_540.gif)

 

 **ugly & lonely: **im going back to sleep

 **ugly & lonely:** bye losers

 

 **boogiemonster:** ..

 **boogiemonster:** so

 **boogiemonster:** r yall gonna introduce me to kun’s loverboy ;)

 

 **baby snake:** sure i’ll set it up

 

 

**Friday 3:02 pm**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

 **ugly & lonely: **hey guys

 **ugly & lonely:** im bored

 **ugly & lonely: **guys

 **ugly & lonely: **mr. huang is breaking my bones right now sav eme

 **ugly & lonely: **…

 **ugly & lonely: **fine 

 **ugly & lonely: **be that way

 

 

**Friday 4:27 pm**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

 **ugly & lonely:** my favourite bros

 **ugly & lonely:** u wanna go out tonight

 **ugly & lonely:** i need a drink

 **ugly & lonely:** …

 

 

**Friday 7:43 pm**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

 **ugly & lonely:** ok r yall mad at me or smthin

 **ugly & lonely: **whats up

 **ugly & lonely: **ur gonna make me cry

 

 

**Friday 8:56 pm**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

 **ded meme:** sorry kun

 **ded meme:** we were busy

 

 **ugly & lonely:** with what???

 

 **boogiemonster:** we were hanging with friends

 **boogiemonster:** chilling

 

 **ugly & lonely:** u 2 were tgt??

 

 **ded meme:** and justin

 

 **ugly & lonely: **but u didnt invite me????

 

 **boogiemonster:** sorry

 **boogiemonster:** it was last minute

 **boogiemonster:** slipped our mind

 

 **ugly & lonely:** wow okay

 **ugly & lonely:** i see how it is

 **ugly & lonely:** who’d u hang with

 

 **baby snake:** no one u know

 **baby snake:** not even gonna bohter to explain to u

 

 **ded meme:** ?????

 **ded meme:** but u said

 

 **baby snake:** fan chengcheng i dare you :)

 

 **ded meme:** :))))))) never mind

 

 **ugly & lonely:** ..

 **ugly & lonely: **you guys are acting weird…

 **ugly & lonely:** cant u guys send a pic or something maybe i know them

 

 **baby snake:** no.

 

 **ded meme:** well….

 

 **baby snake:** chengcheng, no!  >:(

 

**boogiemonster:** [image.jpeg](https://78.media.tumblr.com/e4e28d96efa6a4187faf4cd764538206/tumblr_oqzep2efoi1w7mwd2o2_1280.jpg)

 

 **baby snake:** *screams in frustration*

 

 **ugly & lonely: **ohh is that seunghyuk 

 

 **baby snake:**???? u know seunghyuk??

 

 **ugly & lonely:** mutual friends

 **ugly & lonely: **i know ppl other than u guys

 **ugly & lonely: **the other guy looks rlly familiar….

 

 **baby snake:** HAAHHA u dont know him :))))))

 

 **ugly & lonely:** hes cute

 **ugly & lonely: **whats his number lmao

 

 **baby snake:** im not gonna give it to u so forget it

 

 **ugly & lonely:** i love my friends you guys are really the best :)

 

 

**Friday 9:19 pm**

 

**hot asshole sent a message to jeongjeong**

 

 

 **hot asshole:** i hate my friends 

 

 **jeongjeong:** :o why??

 

 **hot asshole:** i just do

 **hot asshole:** theyre huge dicks

 

 **jeongjeong:** oh

 **jeongjeong:** well if they’re huge dicks

 **jeongjeong:** and you’re a hot asshole

 **jeongjeong:** wouldn’t you guys fit well together?

 

 **hot asshole:** but thats not the point!

 **hot asshole:** the point is that theyre dicks and i hate them

 

 **jeongjeong:** do you even have a reason to?

 

 **hot asshole:** yes

 **hot asshole:** theres this cute guy

 **hot asshole:** but my friends wont give me his number

 **hot asshole:** >:(

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 **jeongjeong:** that’s it?

 **jeongjeong:** that’s really petty to be honest

 

 

**jeongjeong changed hot asshole’s name to the pettiest**

 

 

 **the pettiest:** no its not

 **the pettiest:** the guy was really really cute so its justified

 

 **jeongjeong:** oh…….

 **jeongjeong:** what’s his name?

 

 **the pettiest:** idk tbh lol

 **the pettiest:** my friends just sent me a pic of him

 **the pettiest:** [image.jpeg](https://78.media.tumblr.com/e4e28d96efa6a4187faf4cd764538206/tumblr_oqzep2efoi1w7mwd2o2_1280.jpg)

 

 **jeongjeong:** SEUNGHYUK???

 

 **the pettiest:** wait u know him?

 

 **jeongjeong:** yeahh we’re rlly close friends

 **jeongjeong:** yeah seunghyukkie’s really cute i totally understand

 

 **the pettiest:** nono not seunghyuk

 **the pettiest:** im friends with him too

 **the pettiest:** i meant the other guy

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 **jeongjeong:** the other guy…?

 

 **the pettiest:** yeah the one taking the selca

 **the pettiest:** hes rlly cute right?

 

 **jeongjeong:** well

 **jeongjeong:** I don’t have to answer your questions

 

 **the pettiest:** u know him too?

 

 **jeongjeong:** you could say that….

 

 **the pettiest:** really??

 **the pettiest:** do u have his number?

 

 **jeongjeong:** yes but I’m not giving it to you

 

 **the pettiest:** ill stop talking to u

 **the pettiest:** i actually will this time

 

 **jeongjeong:** ..you can’t just keep using that as blackmail!

 

 **the pettiest:** yeah i can

 **the pettiest:** u cant stop me

 

 **jeongjeong:** …

 **jeongjeong:** what if he doesn’t want you to have his phone number?

 

 **the pettiest:** ill deal with that later

 **the pettiest:** just give it to me

 

 **jeongjeong:** ..

 **jeongjeong:** you won’t stop talking to me if I give it to you?

 

 **the pettiest:** ofc

 

 **jeongjeong:** fine..

 **jeongjeong:** 1996 0318

 

 **the pettiest:** omg actually??

 **the pettiest:** thank you so much i love you

 

 

**Friday 9:42 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

 **Sad Dad™:** GUYS

 **Sad Dad™:** HE SAID I LOVE YOU

 **Sad Dad™:** MY HEART???!?!??!

 

 

 **AI NI:** who?

 

 **dimples:** who else lol

 

 **Sad Dad™:** CAI

 **Sad Dad™:** XU

 **Sad Dad™:** FRICKINg

 **Sad Dad™:** KUN

 **Sad Dad™:** AHFKHLKHLEISHFKSJD

 

 **dimples:** well someone’s in a good mood

 **dimples:** wt did u do lol

 

 **Sad Dad™:** I gave him my phone number

 **Sad Dad™:** he doesn’t know it’s mine tho ahah

 **Sad Dad™:** he called me cute too!

 

 **hamtaro:** does that mean we’re getting another dad?

 **hamtaro:** thank god zheng-ge is so damn lonely all the time

 **hamtaro:** its starting to get sad tbh

 

 **Sad Dad™:** wow

 **Sad Dad™:** this slander

 **Sad Dad™:** this is why im the sad dad

 

 **wenjunnie:** quanzhe are you okay?

 **wenjunnie:** you’ve been acting up :(

 

 **just in time:** yeah :(

 **just in time:** yesterday he swore at me and ate my vanilla pudding

 **just in time:** but the day before he said he was dieting!

 

 **Sad Dad™:** aww baobei

 **Sad Dad™:** are you upset?

 

 **just in time:** yes dad ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

 **just in time:** pls punish quanzhe

 

 **Sad Dad™:** i wasn’t talking to u

 **Sad Dad™:** quanzhe honey are you okay? :(

 

 **hamtaro:** i don’t want to talk about it..

 **hamtaro:** ..

 **hamtaro:** i’ll tell u guys if i need help, okay?

 

 **Sad Dad™:** poor baby :(

 

 **just in time:** what how about me

 **just in time:** im the youngest here  >:(

 

 **Sad Dad™:** im here for you too <3

 **Sad Dad™:** all of you

 

 **fanxixi:** you must be in a really really good mood lol

 

 **dimples:** i love you too  <3

 

 **wenjunnie:** my heart feels so warm and fluffy

 

 **Sad Dad™:** waiit so what do i dooo

 **Sad Dad™:** like if xukun actually texts me

 

 **AI NI:** justin said u didnt want him to hv ur phone number tho

 

 **Sad Dad™:** at first yeah

 **Sad Dad™:** he threatened to stop talking to me if i didn t give it to him :(

 

 **dimples:** aww

 **dimples:** how r u so soft jesus

 

 

**dimples changed Sad Dad™’s name to Soft Dad™**

 

 

 **wenjunnie:** just be yourself 

 **wenjunnie:** if he can’t see how amazing you are then

 **wenjunnie:** he doesn’t deserve you <3

 

 **Soft Dad™:** you’re making me blush >/////<

 

 **hamtaro:** the cringe here is really strong

 

 **fanxixi:** quanzhe let us have our moment pls

 

 

 

**Saturday 8:57 am**

**[+86 1998 0802] messaged [+86 1996 0318]**

 

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

hi :)

your friend gave me your phone number

I’m Cai Xukun :)

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i miss seunghyuk so much it physically hurts :((
> 
> also im a sucker for yuehua family love sooo theyre all soft supportive bois for each other here <3
> 
> sooo i hope u guys liked it and maybe you can tell me what you thought??
> 
> LOVE YALL LOTS FOR READING THIS CRAP LOL
> 
> also yall can come talk to me on tumblr @drowningoncloudnine if you want i like friends :))


	4. Bro? Bro.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> everyone is a mess.

**Saturday 8:57 am**

**[+86 1998 0802] messaged [+86 1996 0318]**

 

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

hi :)

your friend gave me your phone number

I’m Cai Xukun :)

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

uh

hi

do I know you?

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

probably not

but we have mutual friends

Justin and ChengCheng?

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

oh

they gave you my phone number…?

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

ah no

someone else did

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

oh who?

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

uh

this dude called jeongjeong

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

oh really

how do you know him

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

tbh i don’t irl

he just messaged me one day

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

lol

he’s so handsome and cool

everyone says he’s cute tho :(

but he told me that he doesn’t like people calling him that

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

well sweetheart

I’m sure he’s nowhere as cute as you ;)

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

!!

you don’t even know me though..

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

you’re right I don’t

I would love if you gave me the chance though :)

you won’t regret it

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

…how do i know if ur actually cai xukun

you could be pretending to be him or something

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

[img.jpeg](https://78.media.tumblr.com/bbe7cdb5cf138eb9680789a0dee9c7b3/tumblr_p6zsfw0uaz1v4q50qo3_400.jpg)

good enough for you babe?

 

 

**Saturday 9:26 am**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

**Soft Dad™:** plan my funeral guys

**Soft Dad™:** I have officially died

**Soft Dad™:** play EOEO at my funeral

 

**AI NI:** okay sure

 

**Soft Dad™:** are you not going to ask me why I died

**Soft Dad™:** rude

 

**wenjunnie:** I bet its cai xukun related

 

**dimples:** you don’t say lol

**dimples:** what did he do

 

**Soft Dad™:** HE CALLED ME

**Soft Dad™:** B

**Soft Dad™:** A

**Soft Dad™:** B

**Soft Dad™:** E

 

**just in time:** huh

 

 

**Saturday 10:39 am**

 

**Nation’s Top Rappers**

 

 

**baby snake:** cai xu kun

 

**ugly & lonely: **hm ㄱ_ㄱ

**ugly & lonely:** what do you want

 

**baby snake changed ugly & lonely ’s name to creep**

 

**creep:** ???

 

**baby snake:** so i’ve heard that youve been calling strangers babe these days

 

**creep:** …

**creep:** so you’ve been talking to the cute guy

**creep:** wts his name btw i wanna search him up

 

**baby snake:** u dont know his name yet ur calling him babe smh

**baby snake:** wt a perv

 

**creep:** wow

**creep:** i just want to get to know this guy

 

**boogiemonster:** his names zhengting lmao

 

**creep:** thanks bro

 

**boogiemonster:** youre welcome bro

 

**creep:** bro

 

**boogiemonster:** bro

 

**baby snake:** you guys are so gross

**baby snake:** but im watching u cxk

**baby snake:** i know everything

**baby snake:** don’t try to hide shit from me

 

**creep:** im just gonna leave now…

 

 

**Saturday 12:17 pm**

 

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

hey zhengzheng-ah

do you mind if i call you that?

and i wanna know r u free today

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

hii

suree hehe :3

and i am after 4 whats up

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

:)

soo i was thinking

maybe we could like meet up or smthing if thats okay

like to get to know one another a bit

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

oh

wow

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

..

do you not want to?

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

no no!

i just wasn’t expecting this so quick!

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

take your time babe ;)

im right here whenever you need me~

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

!!

you’re so rude!!

⁄⁄(⁄⁄⁄ฅ́дฅ̀⁄⁄)⁄⁄⁄

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

awww is baby flustered?

don’t worry I’ll make sure you’ll have fun~

meet me at the coffee shop two blocks off campus today at 5, ‘kay?

 

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

well

if you put it that way

fine but you better make it worth my time ~~

(✿´ ꒳ ` )

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

i’ll make sure of it baby ;)

 

 

 

**Saturday 12:36 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

**AI NI:** hey do y’all hear screaming

 

**wenjunnie:** far, far away…

 

**Soft Dad™:** GuYs

**Soft Dad™:** i HaVe A dAtE

**Soft Dad™:** WITH

**Soft Dad™:** cAi XuKuN

**Soft Dad™:** AHAJKDfhlkaj lkja

**Soft Dad™:** AND HE CALLED ME

**Soft Dad™:** BABY AHHH

 

**just in time:** oh

**just in time:** so where are you going?

 

**hamtaro:** justin asking a genuine question?

**hamtaro:** what is this alternate universe that we’re living in?

 

**just in time:** shut the fuck up hamster boy

**just in time:** or imma expose you

**just in time:** fight me bih (ง •̀_•́)ง

 

**Soft Dad™:** guys stop omg

**Soft Dad™:** don’t fight (❁°͈▵°͈)

**Soft Dad™:** and we’re going to that coffeeshop after classes hehe

 

**dimples:** justin’s going through a phase lol

**dimples:** omg u know i found this meme of chengcheng and justin

**dimples:** and it legit just represents my life lmao

**dimples:** [img.jpeg](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DdAmvSEVAAALFqx.jpg)

**dimples:** chengcheng is me

**dimples:** and justin is my motivation

 

**fanxixi:** LMAO

**fanxixi:** HONESTLY SAEM

 

**wenjunnie:** sigh

**wenjunnie:** _@Soft Dad™_ why do all your kids have ADHD

**wenjunnie:** they legit cant concentrate on the same topic for 2 seconds?

 

**Soft Dad™:** KIDS

**Soft Dad™:** SERIOUS toPIC here

**Soft Dad™:** WHAT DO I WEAR

 

**just in time:** just wear anything bro

**just in time:** if ur going with xukun its all coming off anyways

 

**AI NI:** true dat

 

**Soft Dad™:** …

**Soft Dad™:** how do i look?

**Soft Dad™:** [image.jpeg](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DdEjcJAVMAENZA4.jpg)

 

**fanxixi:** u look great

**fanxixi:** don’t expect to wear it the whole night tho

 

**just in time:** xukun’s gonna be ripping that shirt open the same way you rip your masks open

 

**AI NI:** ur eyebrows look like caterpillars haha

 

**dimples:** wow our only parent is a hoe gg

 

**Soft Dad™:** i hate you all

 

**wenjunnie:** i didn’t even say anything tho

 

**Soft Dad™:** except for you then

 

**hamtaro:** :(

 

**Soft Dad™:** and you of course baobei <3

 

**hamtaro:** :)  <3

 

 

**Saturday 12:57 pm**

 

**The cool yuehua kids**

 

 

**the rich one:** GUYS

**the rich one:** we should follow zhengting

**the rich one:** we need to protect him from that bad man >:(

 

**dance machine:** reviving this dead chat i see

 

**who stole my crops:** fuck yeah!

 

**tree:** stop swearing

**tree:** just bc zheng’s not here it doesn’t mean im not watching

 

**mom’s fav:** why is wenjun the overbearing parent now

 

**tree:** cuz im a good person that does the right thing

 

**dance machine:** how tragic

 

**tree:** as tragic as your haircut?

 

**monkeyboi:** OOF SICK BURN

 

**dance machine:** i like my hair

 

**mom’s fav:** what really?

**mom’s fav:** [img.jpeg](https://scontent-lga3-1.cdninstagram.com/vp/cd2b2f2cb085a4ecfe3f1add8c151cd9/5B9F8C2A/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/p750x750/32135495_162604364583842_347637702365020160_n.jpg?ig_cache_key=MTc4NDMzNzQ3MTI1NDA5NTA0Mw%3D%3D.2)

**mom’s fav:** i mean look at this shit

 

**who stole my crops:** AHAHAH PFFSHHSH

**who stole my crops:** UR SO BALD???

 

 

**the rich one changed dance machine ’s name to lost wig pls return**

 

 

**lost wig pls return:** i actually hate all of you???

 

**the rich one:** back to the point tho

**the rich one:** we gotta make sure zhengting doesnt get mauled

 

**tree:** … its just a date tho…

 

**the rich one:** that’s what xukun wants him to think but

**the rich one:** once zhengting turns around

**the rich one:** BAM

**the rich one:** he’s gonna hit that ass so hard ge won’t be able to sit for weeks

 

**monkeyboi:** ew

**monkeyboi:** can u pls not talk about xukun and zheng-ge doing the hanky panky

 

**the rich one:** IM JUST SAYING

 

**who stole my crops:** don’t worry minghao :) i’ll go with you

 

**the rich one:** uh its justin biatch get it right

**the rich one:** also u better if u wanna live to see bing-jie next week

 

**lost wig pls return:** rip

**lost wig pls return:** im coming too i need to see wt this cai xukun is made of

 

**mom’s fav:** should we rlly be doing this guys…

**mom’s fav:** zheng-ge will get so mad if he finds out tho…

 

**the rich one:** don’t you want to make sure that our dad-to-be is the right one for mom?

**the rich one:** we need to be there to protect zheng-ge!

**the rich one:** wt if something happens to zheng-ge and ur not there?

 

**mom’s fav:** true…

**mom’s fav:** but if we get in trouble its on you tho

 

**the rich one:** k

**the rich one:** _@tree @monkeyboi_ u in?

 

**monkeyboi:** wtever lol sure

**monkeyboi:** as long as they don’t start doing any funky stuff in front of us

 

**who stole my crops:** _@tree_ ???

 

**tree:** …

**tree:** fine lets do this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hihi~
> 
> okay so this chapter wasn't that eventful but its mainly just filler for the D-A-T-E and all soooo :)
> 
> since i dont really have an actual plan for this fic, maybe you guys can suggest some topics / events that could be involved????
> 
> also i really appreciate knowing what you guys think so maybe you can leave a comment or something ??
> 
> come talk to me on tumblr @drowningoncloudnine lets be friends
> 
> also is it just me or is zeren's new hair cut tragic?? i miss his long(er) hair already ahhhh


	5. Justin gets away with everything.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zhengkun goes on their date and the yuehua kids are grounded. Or are they?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY so this chapter is basically a short filler chapter so stuff happens but honestly not much RIP
> 
> so i hope yall enjoy oh AND IF YALL DONt kNOW THERE ARE ACTUAL LINKS IN THE FILES THEY SEND EACH OTHER THAT U CAN CLICK ON idk if yall knew but i have a lot of pictures and gifs in this chapter that i like so i hope yall look at them too :)

**Saturday 5:23 pm**

 

**The cool yuehua kids**

 

 

**monkeyboi:** _@who stole my crops @the rich one_ where the fuck are you guys

 

**who stole my crops:** justin cant decide what to wear

 

**monkeyboi:** everyone is here

**monkeyboi:** ??? it doesnt matter wt he wears

 

**who stole my crops:** he says he needs a disguise

**who stole my crops:** ok we’re on the way

**who stole my crops:** i think justin looks stupid tho

 

**mom’s fav:** pic

 

**who stole my crops:** [img.jpeg](https://78.media.tumblr.com/357ffd1cc7edd089c9b46e5bbb31c319/tumblr_p9608pvlxY1xp81mbo1_540.jpg)

 

**tree:** wow

**tree:** u look

**tree:**  ...interesting

 

**lost wig pls return:** no he looks like a frickin hipster

**lost wig pls return:** he’ll get zheng’s attention

 

**the rich one:** r u shading me bitch

**the rich one:** i look great

 

**mom’s fav:** GUYS

**mom’s fav:** I SEE MOM

 

**monkeyboi:** where are u standing rn wtf

**monkeyboi:** i dont see him what

 

**tree:** hes literally right in front of Starbucks what are you on about

 

**who stole my crops:** chunchun’s blind what do u expect

 

**lost wig pls return:** CXK spotted at 10 o’clock

 

**mom’s fav:** ???

**mom’s fav:** i dont see him

 

**lost wig pls return:** ***MY*** 10oclock

 

**the rich one:** FOLLOW THEM

**the rich one:** wenjun and xinchun go behind them

**the rich one:** chengcheng and i will be on their right

**the rich one:** the rest go on their left

 

**mom’s fav:** who made u boss

 

**the rich one:** it’s my plan so im boss

 

**who stole my crops:** DON”T U KNOW IMMA

 

**lost wig pls return:** 내가 널 이끄는 BOSS

 

**who stole my crops:** DON”T U KNOW IMMA

 

**lost wig pls return:** 내가 널 움직인 PLAYEr

 

**the rich one:** STFU FOLLOW theM

**the rich one:** okay GO

 

**lost wig pls return:** WE SO YOUNG

 

**monkeyboi:** WE SO FREAKY

 

**lost wig pls return:** WE BE SCREAMING GO

**lost wig pls return:** GO GO

 

**the rich one:** BIH IM THE ONE SCREAMING GO FOLLOW TheM GHSKLD

 

**lost wig pls return:** [link.mp4](https://78.media.tumblr.com/be327b015d9d8bceb6ac768f77ca79d5/tumblr_p56cdd86wH1wb7htoo1_500.gif)

 

**the rich one:** he's hot

**the rich one:** i still hate you all

 

 

**Saturday 10:02 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

**Soft Dad™:** I am so disappointed in you all

 

**hamtaro:** First things first

 

**dimples:** im the realest

 

**hamtaro:** shut up ding zedumb

**hamtaro:** the plan was all Justin’s idea

**hamtaro:** I was forced into participating

 

**just in time:** excuse u

**just in time:** u volunteered bih

 

**hamtaro:** u said u would take the blame

 

**wenjunnie:** ^ true story bro

 

**fanxixi:** why are ya’ll even arguing

**fanxixi:** we know mom’s not gonna punish wenjun or quanzhe anyways

**fanxixi:** biased af ㄱ_ㄱ

 

**Soft Dad™:** since when did i bias wenjun wtf

 

**AI NI:** are u kidding me

**AI NI:** [gif.gif](https://78.media.tumblr.com/2713da30b7e42c17b50d38b78ce8816b/tumblr_p6zdyawLfq1x7innao3_540.gif)

**AI NI:** [image.img](https://78.media.tumblr.com/d30b64bd5dcfc869e0fb4fdea6359aab/tumblr_p4psivJ9G71x73kuuo1_1280.jpg)

**AI NI:** [image2.img](https://78.media.tumblr.com/5e2c54714d8970eec732eba9f70d0112/tumblr_p844j3TYAV1xphwk6o2_1280.jpg)

**AI NI:** ur so whipped for each other cmon bruh

 

**Soft Dad™:** …

 

**wenjunnie:** …

 

**Soft Dad™:** why do u hv those saved on ur phone

 

**AI NI:** theyre cute and makes me uwu

 

**Soft Dad™:** ur weird but ok

**Soft Dad™:** i’m still very upset with you all tho

**Soft Dad™:** INCLUDING quanzhe and wenjun

 

**hamtaro:** :((

 

**Soft Dad™:** you KNOW how much I was looking forward to today

**Soft Dad™:** im still thinking of a punishment

**Soft Dad™:** im so embarrassed how am i supposed to talk to xukun now?

 

**just in time:** you’ll figure it out

 

 

**Sunday 10:59 am**

 

**jeongjeong sent a message to the pettiest**

 

 

**jeongjeong:** hi

**jeongjeong:** we haven’t talked in a long time

 

**the pettiest:** oh hey

**the pettiest:** yeah i know right

**the pettiest:** whats up

 

**jeongjeong:** so

**jeongjeong:** i saw you yesterday out

**jeongjeong:** on a date

**jeongjeong:** with zhengting

**jeongjeong:** just wanted to ask how was it

 

**the pettiest:** u saw us?

**the pettiest:** u jealous? ;)

 

**jeongjeong:** no…

**jeongjeong:** im just asking

**jeongjeong:** for a friend and all

**jeongjeong:** heard it got pretty weird and all with justin and them

 

**the pettiest:** oh it wasn’t that bad lmao

 

**jeongjeong:** uh what happened

 

**the pettiest:** we went to a fun fair

**the pettiest:** it was rlly fun

 

**jeongjeong:** that sounds cool

 

**the pettiest:** it was really nice

 

**jeongjeong:** and what happened?

 

**the pettiest:** his kids showed up and stuff

**the pettiest:** zhengzheng got really flustered and stuff

**the pettiest:** cute af

 

**jeongjeong:** oh

**jeongjeong:** cool

**jeongjeong:** uh

**jeongjeong:** so r u gonna see him again?

 

**the pettiest:** yeah ofc

**the pettiest:** probably gonna ask him out again tmrw when i see him

 

**jeongjeong:** omg actually?!

 

**the pettiest:** yeah?

**the pettiest:** ??u ok?

 

**jeongjeong:** ahah

**jeongjeong:** yeah!

**jeongjeong:** totally!

**jeongjeong:** uh i have to go now!

**jeongjeong:** bye!

 

**the pettiest:** youre so weird wtf

 

 

**Sunday 11:14 am**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

**Soft Dad™:** ya’ll are lucky

**Soft Dad™:** kunkun’s asking me out tmrw so yall ungrounded

 

**hamtaro:** yay!

**hamtaro:** i love my dads  <3

 

**Soft Dad™:** =,= no

**Soft Dad™:** well not yet

 

**tree:** “well not yet”

**tree:** well not yet better be soon im tired of picking up after them when you’re not around

 

**just in time:** we’re not grounded?

**just in time:** _@fanxixi_ told u so lol

 

**Soft Dad™:** *except for justin 

 

**fanxixi:** hah you own me lunch _@just in time_

 

**just in time:** what the fuck?

**just in time:** oh shit

**just in time:** i meant heck

 

**Soft Dad™:** cause you were the one that tricked everyone into following your dumb plan

 

**just in time:** no i didnt!

 

**Soft Dad™:** ur washing the dishes for a week

 

**just in time:** thats so not fair

 

**Soft Dad™:** fine 5 days

 

**just in time:** daaaaad :’(((((

 

**Soft Dad™:** 3 days and im not backing down anymore

 

**just in time:** (⌯˃̶᷄ ﹏ ˂̶᷄⌯)ﾟ

 

**Soft Dad™:** …

**Soft Dad™:** ugh whatever just wash the dishes tmrw night okay?

 

**just in time:** okayy!

**just in time:** ILY  <3

 

**Soft Dad™:** me too<3

**Soft Dad™:** even if you make me upset sometimes <3

 

**AI NI:** oh wow

**AI NI:** the gays are out strong today

**AI NI:** [vid.mp4](https://media1.tenor.com/images/0aa697d965ee612c9acdc6dadefa8891/tenor.gif?itemid=11313239)

 

**Soft Dad™:** shut up least favourite son

 

**AI NI:**   you all don't appreciate me enough =͟͟͞͞( •̀д•́)))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeahh so not too much happened but i hope you guys still enjoyed :) 
> 
> ohh btw i changed my username :) idk why i just felt like changing it and it was the first thing i thought of
> 
> did you know that chengcheng's korean name is 판청청 which is literally "PAN CHEONGCHEONG" when u romanize it how TRAGIC it doesnt do him justice
> 
> anyways thank you for reading and i hope yall have a great dayy i really apprecite comments and stuff so if you can i would love to know what you think! <3


	6. Wenjun, the true intellectual

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The yuahua kids are still drilling Xukun for dating their mom, and there's a festival at their school happening...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOO theres basically a time skip from the last chapter to this~ I'm mid exams right now but I just really need to destress so I wrote this but it's kind of shortttt :( hopefully you guys will still like it though!

**Tuesday 10:32 pm**

 

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

hey baby

u up?

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

hi~<3

whats up? ^.^

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

nothing~

just wanted to see how my favourite baby boy is doing

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

if you have a favourite does that mean you have more than one? :((

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

wt?? ofc not

do you actually think i would do that?

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

kun, im joking lol

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

OH

LMAO I KNEW THAT

but anyways just wanna let you know im having this performance thing with Ziyi and some other friends

it’s like a joint fair event with this uni in Korea

it’s this sat

we’re going to be rapping and stuff

its gonna be lit ㄱuㄱ

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

oh really?

what university is this with?

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

eh idk

but they’ll be like going to our classes and stuff for like two weeks too

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

why is this the first time im hearing about this? 

i wanna perform tooo ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

awww :( sorry i didn’t tell you earlier

cause the korean uni is going to be performing dance mostly

we’re doing the singing and rapping

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

ahh okayy ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

of course i’ll still come though!

<3

can’t wait to see you~

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

aww ily <3

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

ack love you too~

 

 

**Wednesday 4:07 am**

 

**huangminggood adds caixk, pancheongcheong, zingderen, quanzhelee, xinchunchun, wenjunbi to the chat**

 

**huangminggood changed chat to Father &Sons**

 

**huangminggood changed his name to kinghao**

 

 

**kinghao:** sup bitches

 

**pancheongcheong:** hao its 4am

 

**kinghao:** ur point?

 

**pancheongcheong:** go sleep

 

**kinghao:** no.

 

**pancheongcheong:** i tried ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 

**pancheongcheong:** once zheng ge finds out…

 

**kinghao:** lol he wont

**kinghao:** _@caixk_ hey boy

 

**quanzhelee:** ~~make 'em whistle like a missile, bomb, bomb~~

 

**kinghao:** ~~stfu with that blackpink shiz~~

**kinghao:** ~~twice ftw~~

 

**quanzhelee:** (ง’̀-‘́)ง u wanna go?

 

**wenjunbi:** shut up

**wenjunbi:** i like both

**wenjunbi:** fan wars are dumb just like you two

**wenjunbi:** this is why trump is prez

 

**xinchunchun:** wenjun, the true intellectual

**xinchunchun:** here we see two brain dead monkeys fighting about their favourites, while the highly intelligent wenjun tries to separate them. of course, the monkeys dont listen cause they’re dumb

 

**zingderen:** thats an insult to monkeys

 

**caixk:** wtf is this?

 

**kinghao:** is that a way to be speaking to your future kids?

**kinghao:** i expected more from you smh

 

**caixk:** kids wt

 

**zingderen:** yeh lol

**zingderen:** youre dating our mom that means ur our dad

 

**xinchunchun changed caixk ’s name to daddy**

 

 

**wenjunbi:** ew gross wtf

**wenjunbi:** _@daddy_ you’re not my daddy

 

 

**wenjunbi changed daddy ’s name to zhengting’s daddy**

 

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** …

**zhengting’s daddy:** so why am i here at 4am

 

**kinghao:** you’ve been dating our mom for almost a month

**kinghao:** it’s time to lay down some ground rules

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** ??

**zhengting’s daddy:** didn’t u give me this talk before?

**zhengting’s daddy:** no making out in front of you guys and bring him home by 12am

**zhengting’s daddy:** i remember …

 

**kinghao:** NO i mean like

**kinghao:** ground rules for US

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** ??

 

**pancheongcheong:** what he means is

**pancheongcheong:** ur probs gonna be over at our place a lot

**pancheongcheong:** we run our house a certain way

 

**xinchunchun:** lol xukun is like wtf i didnt sign up for this

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** i honestly did not

**zhengting’s daddy:** but anything for zhengting  <3

 

**wenjunbi:** good cause if u didnt sign up for this we’re gonna kick u out

 

 

**Wednesday 6:42 am**

 

**Father &Sons**

 

 

**kinghao:** yeah so thats it

**kinghao:** not a lot but ^.^ u need to know them

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** theres 43 rules wtf

**zhengting’s daddy:** how am i supposed to remember that

**zhengting's daddy:** these rules are stupid

**zhengting's daddy:** "anything that we want, you buy" ???

**zhengting's daddy:**  these are more orders than ground rules...

 

**zingderen:** “anything for zhengting  <3”

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** …

**zhengting’s daddy:** ugh whatever

 

**zingderen:** oh btw!

**zingderen:** zheng-ge told us about the festival fair

**zingderen:** the joint one with the kr uni

**zingderen:** can we come too?

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** yeah sure~

**zhengting’s daddy:** the more the better

**zhengting's daddy:** we're gonna be performing

 

**xinchunchun:** oh yayy

**xinchunchun:** ge’s really excited

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** mm i hope so

**zhengting’s daddy:** it’s gonna be lit

**zhengting’s daddy:** can’t wait to see zhengting there ^.^

 

**kinghao:** remember we’re watching you ㄱ-ㄱ

 

 

**Saturday 8:56 am**

 

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

hey kunkun~

I can’t wait to see you on stage today

you’re gonna do so well

I’m going to be with some friends but I’ll come find you afterwards, okay?

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

aww babe ily

you’re so cute uwu

keep your phone on ring i’ll call you ;)

love you lots bb

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

i’ll see you later then?

 

**[+86 1998 0802]**

okayy~

love you <3

 

**[+86 1996 0318]**

i love you tooo :*

 

 

**Saturday 3:17 pm**

 

**Father &Sons**

 

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** hey guys

**zhengting’s daddy:** i just got off stage

**zhengting’s daddy:** have you seen zhengting?

**zhengting’s daddy:** i saw him when i was on stage but he disappeared

 

**xinchunchun:** i saw him with eunki

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** eunki?

**zhengting’s daddy:** who dat?

 

**kinghao:** OMG EUNKI HYUNG’S HERE??

**kinghao:** SINCE WHEN??

 

**zingderen:** he’s part of snu’s dance crew

**zingderen:** i saw him backstage today

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** UH whose eunki??

 

**wenjunbi:** did zhengting not tell you lmao

**wenjunbi:** you should ask him

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** I CAN”T EVEN FIND HIM??

 

**quanzhelee:** well thats ur problem

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** KJDHSLK YOU”RE NO HELP

**zhengting’s daddy:** >:(((((

 

**quanzhelee:** what :(

**quanzhelee:** ~~i think eunki-hyung is a better dad than xukun is~~

**quanzhelee:** ~~at least he doesn’t yell at us~~

 

**zhengting’s daddy:**  WHO THE FUCK IS EUNKI?!?!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who knows what will happen in this next chapter?
> 
> tbh i really dont know myself but I have an idea
> 
> it's currently 2:21 am and I am fried from studying rip
> 
> Hopefully you guys liked this chapter and if you have anything to say please leave comments i live off them~
> 
> :))


	7. FLEXIBOIS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey baby who the fuck is 정정?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyy so this is a hella short chapter sorryy :(( but i don't want chapters to be too too long if i add everything together so im splitting things apart whoop whoop
> 
> btw i realised that zhengting and xukun don't have cute couple names saved as each other on their phones.... so i didn't bother to write that in and changed it immediately lol

**Saturday 3:29 pm**

 

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

hey baby <3

where are you right now?

 

**[i love kunkun]**

hii kun~ <3

you were so amazing today!

i’m with some of my korean friends but i’ll meet you at home!

is that okay?

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

ofc bb as long as ur happy~

uhh just wanna ask how did u meet them….?

 

**[i love kunkun]**

have I not told you before? :o

i thought i did sorry >///<

i met them from my exchange trip second year!

i just havent seen them in so long and i miss them a lot!

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

ahh..

its okay baby have fun~

 

**[i love kunkun]**

are you mad? :(

im sorry i left before i could tell you :(((

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

nono! im not mad baby i swear <3

 

**[i love kunkun]**

aww okie good ily <3

[img.jpeg](http://newsimg.sedaily.com/2017/07/08/1OIE9EYHQN_1.jpg)

us as foetuses ^^

oh justin went with me too if u didn’t know!

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

aww bby u look so cute <3 

 

 

**Saturday 3:29 pm**

 

**Father &Sons**

 

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** [img.jpeg](http://newsimg.sedaily.com/2017/07/08/1OIE9EYHQN_1.jpg)

**zhengting’s daddy:** WHO THE FUCK IS ZHENGTING STARING AT

**zhengting’s daddy:** IS THAT THE EUNKI GUY

 

**kinghao:** ??

**kinghao:** no thats seobbie-hyung

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** ZHENGTING”S HOLDING HIS HAND??!??

 

**quanzhelee:** zhengting holds my hand too

**quanzhelee:** does that mean youre gonna yell at me too?

**quanzhelee:** this is exactly why i think eunki-hyung was the best dad

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** OKAY WHO THE FUKC IS THIS EUNKI BITCH

 

**wenjunbi:** hey can you stop being so angry

**wenjunbi:** you’re scaring the kids

**wenjunbi:** if youre really that worried 

**wenjunbi:** then stop bothering us and just ask zhengting about it

 

**xinchunchun** : M O T H E R F U C K I N G  P R E A C H

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** but i dont want him to think im jealous

**zhengting’s daddy:** someone send me a pic of eunki

**zhengting’s daddy:**  im hotter right

 

**pancheongcheong:**  [image.img](https://78.media.tumblr.com/7eef810bce6515dc694e97db822192c1/tumblr_opld1wtGOx1wovkr5o1_500.jpg)

 

**zhengting’s daddy:**  yeah im definitely hotter lol

 

**wenjunbi:** *cough* egotistical as fuck *cough*

 

**zhengting's daddy:** also zhengting's so cute uwu

 

**xinchunchun:** hv u ever seen eunki do modern dance tho

**xinchunchun:** hes like korean zhengting

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** what?

 

**kinghao:** [vid.mp4](https://pa1.narvii.com/6631/07d004b2fa14584a22e31010485e3c67ac05f74e_hq.gif)

**kinghao:** them at dance class lol

 

**pancheongcheong:** i love myself some FLEXIBLE BOIS

 

**zingderen:** hey xukun

**zingderen:** look at this

**zingderen:** [mov.mp4](https://pa1.narvii.com/6462/dc6974e81878ee8e8c1be6fe9519144402fb9d09_hq.gif)

**zingderen:** youre welcome ;)

 

**zhengting’s daddy:** ??!?

**zhengting’s daddy:** who the actual fuck is eunki omg

**zhengting’s daddy:** okay i like really need to talk to zhengting

 

 

**Saturday 4:16 pm**

 

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

zheng~~

where are you right now?

im heading to ur apartment w/ icecream

 

**[i love kunkun]**

im on my way back~

my friends had to leave :(

don’t start without me! xx

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

ofc ofc<3

hey bb?

theres a bouquet outside ur door?

idk what it says tho its in korean

 

**[i love kunkun]**

hmm?

idk is it addressed to me?

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

i dunno i just said its in korean lol

wait lemme try typing it haha

 

**[i love kunkun]**

what you know how to use the korean keyboard now?

lmao what are you now?

korean?

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

no i am chinese >:(

also korean writing is basically just putting pictures together lol

 

**[i love kunkun]**

wow i love a multitalented boyfriend

writing in foreign languages

im so proud *wipes tear from eye*

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

정정???

im pretty sure thats right ahah

is that u?

its from “♡은기♡”???

 

**[i love kunkun]**

..

ahhh

its not for me

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

oh haha

must be delivered to the wrong address then

i just thought it was yours cause its your favourite flower and all

since ur not here yet anyways i’ll go back to the store to return it to them

 

**[i love kunkun]**

nono!

its okay

just bring it in first i’ll handle it when I get back~

you’ll probably rip the petals or something

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

they have to deliver it to the right person before it wilts tho

i might as well go now

 

**[i love kunkun]**

kunkun just leave it

i’ll take it back myself

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

…

if that’s what you want baby <3

 

**[i love kunkun]**

hehe i wuv you uwu

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

me too bb ;*

btw i wanna meet all your korean friends!

 

**[i love kunkun]**

oh

sure of course!

i’ll text them to set things up! ^.^

 

 

**Saturday 4:32 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

**Soft Dad™:** GUYS

**Soft Dad™:** KUN WANTS TO MEET THE KOR GANG WHAT DO I DO

 

**hamtaro:** introduce them?

**hamtaro:** whats the big deal?

 

**Soft Dad™:** UM

**Soft Dad™:** H O N G

**Soft Dad™:** F U C K I N G

**Soft Dad™:** DANCER EXTRAORDINAIRE 

**Soft Dad™:** E U N K I 

**Soft Dad™:** IS THE PROBLEM

 

**fanxixi:** lol you're a dead man rest in pieces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who knows what zhengting's gonna do... also i love kun with a jealous streak hehe
> 
> also im on summer break now so i have more time to write! idk if that means i'll be updating more (probably not tbh) but we'll see!
> 
> thanks for reading!


	8. More than one name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> zhengting: please don’t call me jeongjeong I don’t go by that name anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ITS BEEN SO LONG SINCE I UPDATED THIS IM SORRY :(
> 
> ANYWAYS I HOPE YALL LIKE THIS!~

**Saturday 4:32 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

 **dimples:** hey does anyone have the bio hw?

 

 **Soft Dad™:** im having a crisis and you’re asking about HW???

 

 **dimples:** a man’s gotta do what he needs to survive

 

 **just in time:** im desperate

 

 **dimples:** i have a 63 in the course rn

 **dimples:** mr zhang says if i drop below a 60 he’s kicking me off the dance team

 **dimples:** :((( im his best dancer tho

 

 **wenjunnie:** just ask yanchen to teach you~

 **wenjunnie:** i heard that hes a _great_ teacher

 **wenjunnie:** ;)))))))

 

 **dimples:** FUCK OFF

 **dimples:** I DON”T NEED TO ASK YANCHEN 

 **dimples:** he’ll think im stupid 

 

 **just in time:** are you saying that u aren’t?

 

 **dimples:** 凸ಠ益ಠ)凸

 

 **just in time:**   (uwu) <3333

 

 **hamtaro:** lmao all those 3s look like butts ㅋ ㅋ ㅋ ㅋ ㅋ

 

 **fanxixi:** thats how large zhengting wants his ass to be

 

 **just in time:** GKLJFHGLJK SHOTS FIRED

 

 **Soft Dad™:** GUYS WTF

 **Soft Dad™:** WT DO U MEAN 

 **Soft Dad™:** I HAVE AN ASS

 

 **hamtaro:** you literally have the flattest ass in existence?

 

 **dimples:** boi i have whole archives of your flat as fuck ass

 

 **wenjunnie:** @o@ you do?

 

 **dimples:** [img.jpeg](https://i.imgur.com/Axroqsv.jpg)

 **dimples:** [img2.jpeg](https://78.media.tumblr.com/25221627fe54b99615d2eae22105dea8/tumblr_p80ifqXuG91xpueoko2_1280.jpg)

 **dimples:** [img3.jpeg](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/De7TOnoVQAAZy5D.jpg)

 

 **just in time:** we have the most un-thiccest dad ever

 

 **Soft Dad™:** EXCUSE mE

 **Soft Dad™:** DING ZEREN

 **Soft Dad™:** DELETE THOSE NOW

 

 **dimples:** no.

 

 **Soft Dad™:** or i'll post crusty ass images of you

 

 **dimples:** hmm let me think

 **dimples:** nah still no 

 

 **Soft Dad™:** zeren.jpeg

 **Soft Dad™:** [zeren2.jpeg](https://scontent-ort2-2.cdninstagram.com/vp/5dd325e7f92abe42d4c8d4e4dd9c44aa/5BEB62DC/t51.2885-15/s480x480/e35/28152880_146508976165827_2880015037869588480_n.jpg)

 

 **dimples:** all I see is a model?

 **dimples:** i look amazing

 **dimples:** [selca.jpeg](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/de/c2/0a/dec20ae90507b22eb2c4be52a40a16de.jpg)

 **dimples:** i look great even when i just woke up from a nap

 

 **Soft Dad™:** hey zeren

 **Soft Dad™:** look at this

**Soft Dad™:** [zhengren](https://d.wattpad.com/story_parts/588057326/images/1537ae85143993d0202336461166.gif) [.mp4](https://d.wattpad.com/story_parts/588057326/images/1537ae85143993d0202336461166.gif)

 

 **wenjunnie:** zhengting out here stealing zeren’s man

 

 **dimples:** HES NOT MY MAN

 

 **hamtaro:** (yet)

 

 **dimples:** SHUT uP

 

 **wenjunnie:** … does xukun know about this?

 **wenjunnie:** first eunki, then yanchen….

 

 **hamtaro:** REMEMBER WHEN HE HAD A THING WITH YANJUN TOO

 

 **dimples:** this concludes that Zhengting is a massive hoe

 

 **fanxixi:** i mean its not a surprise

 **fanxixi:** have you seen how zhengting wears his clothes?

 

 **just in time:** [vid.mp4](https://twitter.com/zztarchive/status/1013247391565320192)

 **just in time:** O.o scarred for life

  

 

**hamtaro changed Soft Dad™ ’s name to HO HO HOE**

 

 

 **HO HO HOE:** wow thanks i love this new name :)))))

 

 **hamtaro:** its not our fault you flirt with everything that breathes

 

 **just in time:** YEAH OMG

 **just in time:** THE OTHER DAY ZHENGTING WAS TELLING HIS PLANT tHAT IT LOOKS REALLY PRETTY

 

 **HO HO HOE:** CAuSE IT WAS GROWING REALLY NICE YOU FUCKHEAD

 

 **just in time:** _@fanxixi_ hes yelling at me again save meeee

 

 **HO HO HOE:** for gods sake justin—

 

 **AI NI:** shut the fuck up guys im sleeping

 

 **hamtaro:** oh wow yes anything for king xinchun we will definitely shut up immediately

 

 **AI NI:** … is that sarcasm? ㄱ.ㄱ

 

 **hamtaro:** …

 **hamtaro:** yes you dumb shit

 

**Saturday 8:52 pm**

 

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

Hi

Is this Jeongjeong?

 

**[Zhengting]**

Uh yes..?

who this this?

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

Jeongjeong ahh~

Its Eunki!

I got this number from Justin

Hope you don’t mind :)

 

 

**Add [+82 1997 0929] to your contacts as [Hong Eunki] ?**

**[Yes]**

 

 

**[Zhengting]**

ahh that brat

haha I don’t mind 

and please don’t call me jeongjeong I don’t go by that name anymore

what do you want?

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

Nothing really~

Just wanted to talk to you :)

 

**[Zhengting]**

cool haha

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

what are you doing right now?

:)

 

**[Zhengting]**

nothing much

just working on some stuff

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

like?

 

**[Zhengting]**

ah its nothing important

just this dance for class

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

oh really?

can i see?

i haven’t seen you dance in a long time

you know what?

we should choreograph something together again!

 

**[Zhengting]**

oh uh

sure i guess

maybe when we’re free

:)

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

are you okay with tomorrow?

i just miss you a lot :)

 

**[Zhengting]**

ahh i cant tomorrow

i promised my boyfriend that i would go on a date with him

you know, xukun?

you met him at the festival, right?

he performed too! ^.^

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

oh yeah I remember

the dude in ultra skinny jeans

really didn’t think that you were into that type

 

**[Zhengting]**

i dont think I have a type haha

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

I mean

im a contemporary dancer

and youre a contemporary dancer

and we both do acrobatics

us dating make sense

 

**[Zhengting]**

what are you trying to get at, Eunki?

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

my point is

that does the sexy fuckboy rapper dating the soft contemporary dancer make sense?

just think about it

 

**[Zhengting]**

what the fuck

my relationship is none of your business

who are you to tell me what to think?

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

I’m just saying

don’t cry when he doesn’t turn out to be the man of your dreams

 

**[Zhengting]**

is this what you texted me for

to try and get me to doubt my relationship?

cause guess what buddy it won’t work

I love Xukun and Xukun loves me

so drop it

 

**[Hong Eunki]**

fine i’ll drop it

but don’t say I didn’t warn you

 

 

**Saturday 11:47 pm**

 

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

cai xukun

 

**[Xukun]**

yes?

who is this?

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

you may be very happy with my jeongjeong right now

but im telling you

that your relationship won’t work

 

**[Xukun]**

huh?

jeongjeong?

what are you talking about?

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

uh what

im talking about

your relationship

with my jeongjeong

hello?

 

**[Xukun]**

what relationship though?

I haven’t talked to him in like a month

I havent even met him in person before

I think you have the wrong person

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

wtf no?

he told me you two were dating…

you’re the center guy in the mack daddy performance right?

 

**[Xukun]**

yes…

look i don’t know who you are

and I don’t know what jeongjeong told you

but I’m already in a happy, committed relationship

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

with who then?

 

**[Xukun]**

Zhengting? Zhu Zhengting?

you know him?

tall, skinny, dancer extraordinaire, the most beautiful man in existence?

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

yeah

jeongjeong

 

**[Xukun]**

not jeongjeong

i literally just said zhengting

 

**[+82 1997 0929]**

a person can be known by more than one name

just saying…

 

**[Xukun]**

wait

what?

are you saying that

zhengting is jeongjeong?

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> soooo who knows how xukun will confront zhengting about this?
> 
> anyways thank you for reading and I hope you guys liked this! xx
> 
> if you have anything to say, I really appreciate comments so tell me what you think! <3


	9. Downhill Rollin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are on fire.
> 
> (not literally)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WELL HELLO AGAIN
> 
> I wrote this in half an hour its short and its kinda like 80% filler but stuff will happen up coming and stuff idek LOL
> 
> i hope you guys still enjoy this though even though it's so short~
> 
> (this is my shortest chapter of Not Weird Just Limited Edition to date im so sorry)

**Sunday 9:02 am**

 

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

zhengting

you up yet?

 

**[i love kunkun]**

morning kunkun!

you’re up early today!

what’s up? ^o^

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

hmm i just couldnt sleep well

 

**[i love kunkun]**

aww poor baby :’(

do you want to come over and we can cuddle?

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

actually i have something that I want to talk to you about

 

**[i love kunkun]**

this sounds important

why don’t you come over and you can tell me what’s bothering you?

I don’t like it when I can’t see you face :(

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

actually no

i rather talk to you online

i mean, isn’t that how we first talked to each other in the first place?

 

**[i love kunkun]**

xukun what do you mean?

baby are you okay?

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

why wouldn’t I be?

 

**[i love kunkun]**

you’re acting weird honey

you sure that you’re okay?

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

oh _am i okay?_

i don’t know why don’t you ask jeongjeong?

 

**[i love kunkun]**

uh what?

what do you mean ask jeongjeong?

????

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

oh my god zhengting get with it

you don’t have to fucking pretend anymore 

I

FUCKING

KNOW

THAT

YOU’RE

JEONG JEONG

STOP

PRETENDING

 

**[i love kunkun]**

wtf??

who told you?

kunkun babe I swear its not what you think

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

what do you mean it’s not what i think I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU I THINK

YOU”RE LITERALLY THE PERSON WHO PUT UP A DISGUISE JUST TO TALK TO ME

YOU TRICKED ME FOR SO LONG

I CAN’T EVEN THINK STRAIGHT RIGHT NOW

 

**[i love kunkun]**

[Send Failure] Xukun please

[Send Failure] I swear I wasn’t trying to trick you

[Send Failure] I just had this huge fat crush on you and 

[Send Failure] I didn’t know how to approach you

[Send Failure] please xukun

 

**[i love zhengzheng]**

SERVICE ERROR 409: THE NUMBER YOU ARE TRYING TO REACH HAS BLOCKED INCOMING TEXT MESSAGES FROM THIS NUMBER.

 

**[i love kunkun]**

[Send Failure] xukun....

 

 

**Saturday 4:32 pm**

 

**#TeamYuehua**

 

 

**HO HO HOE:** guys…

**HO HO HOE:** i think xukun broke up with me

 

**just in time:** you think?

**just in time:** how are you not sure about something like this LMAO

 

**AI NI:** justin don’t be a brat

**AI NI:** gege what happened? :c

 

**hamtaro:** gege… are you okay?

 

**HO HO HOE:** xukun found out that i was @jeongjeong

**HO HO HOE:** i dont know how

**HO HO HOE:** i think someone told him

**HO HO HOE:** i’m so confused i don’t know what to do

 

**wenjunnie:** :o oh no

**wenjunnie:** how did he find out???

 

**HO HO HOE:** I DON”T KNOW

**HO HO HOE:** HE LITERALLY JUST MESSAGED ME ASKING IF WE COULD TALK

**HO HO HOE:** THEN HE JUST STARTS SCrEAMING AT ME

 

**dimples:** have you tried talking to him about it?

**dimples:** like properly?

 

**HO HO HOE:** he fricking blocked me before I could explain myself

**HO HO HOE:** i’m just feeling

**HO HO HOE:** i don’t know

**HO HO HOE:** i feel betrayed kind of

**HO HO HOE:** even though i was the one that lied to him in the first place

 

**AI NI:** aww zheng :c

 

**wenjunnie:** i think zeren is saying that you should talk to him

**wenjunnie:** IN PERSON

 

**fanxixi:** i don’t want you to break up with kunkun ㅠuㅠ

**fanxixi:** i actually liked this one this time

 

**just in time:** i never thought that I would say this but

**just in time:** please go get that dick

**just in time:** hes the only person that can put up with your scrawny ass

**just in time:** i don’t want to see you die alone

 

**HO HO HOE:** (.づ;´∩`;)づ.

 

**just in time:** *sighs*

**just in time:** ⊂(・﹏・⊂)

 

**hamtaro:** group hugs!

**hamtaro:** ───==≡≡ΣΣ(っ´▽｀)っ

 

**dimples:** ( >^_^)><(^o^<)

 

**wenjunnie:** (੭ु｡╹▿╹｡)੭ु⁾⁾

 

**AI NI:** ʕっ•ᴥ•ʔっ!

 

**fanxixi:** …

 

**HO HO HOE:** fucking hug us bitch

 

**fanxixi:** ..

**fanxixi:** ugh ⊂(-`д´- ｡⊂)

**fanxixi:** just talk to kunkun and get over with it

**fanxixi:** i dont want to see you here crying over some guy again

**fanxixi:** you better have talked to him before you show up here again

**fanxixi:** (;¬_¬)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.... how was it? T-T sorry i know it was kind of boring
> 
> I'm kind of lost on what I could do with this after this "conflict" wraps up... if you guys have any ideas please tell me! I love suggestions so if you have anything to say HOLLA @ ME
> 
> also the next chapter is probably zhengting&kun's argument + making up... im not really sure how to write that in text form so would you guys be okay with me writing it out instead of using text message form?
> 
> i really appreciate comments and kudos so if yall have any drop some @ me if you want ^-^ thanks so much for reading! xx

**Author's Note:**

> I actually have no idea where this is going or how long this will be... I WILL be updating as often as I can though sooo hopefully you guys would be able to stay interested.
> 
> tbh its kind of disappointing how AO3 doesn't have dms cause I kinda really want to get to know people from in the fandom but I don't use any other platform like twitter and Tumblr (also im shy as heck and im always too embarrassed to start a convo first even when some writers openly invite you to talk to them through their other accounts)
> 
> I actually am really feeling this fic so I hope you guys would find this funny (I have the lamest sense of humor ever) and maybe you guys can tell me what you think!
> 
> (BTW I just wanted to say if ya'll didn't understand xinchun's name "chuang" in Chinese means bed so its xinCHUANG cause all these ppl keep sleeping on him)
> 
> also pls appreciate zeren's dimples they are amazing


End file.
